God is With Us!

When it rains, it pours.

This was the quote that immediately came to mind, when I thought of all that has been happening with my family lately.

A month hadn’t pass us yet since we had to face that nerve-wracking operation my daughter had to undergo and now I had to once again submit myself to that proverbial rollercoaster ride, with my heart jammed in my throat.

Having to face situations like this, makes me feel like I am standing on a precipice, facing a cliff with jagged edges of rocks taunting me below, while behind me is a dark cloud formation that unnamed, unknown dangers could spring out suddenly.

In other words, it felt like no matter which way I look, problems and trials surround me.and rhe members of my family.  Am I just experiencing paranoia or am I just overreacting?  

I read somewhere before that our family members would always be our weaknesses, and I totally agree with that.  Over the years, I would always say to myself, I rather prefer to be the one who’s ill than any member of my family.  Yes, and I would still choose that because, at least, I am actually the one suffering.  The pain is first hand and I could take the pain or know how to handle it or myself on such a situation. 

But when the one who is suffering is a loved one, not really knowing how much in pain he is or when I see him gritting his teeth to whatever he must be going through and to spare me from worrying, nevertheless, I get worried the more.  

Various thoughts bombard my senses then.  I had to shield my inner thoughts from being totally corrupted by all the negative thoughts that just come to taunt me like the monsters they are.  

A battle ensuing inside my brains could prove more energy-depleting and stressful than actually battling it out with fists and fangs (as if, I had been in one).  Anyway, with a physical fight, I would probably receive bruises and gashes even, but with the mental one, the pain of worrying over the unknown is more debilitating.

It takes too much effort to just channel my mind on other things that needed my attention. But then, after too much thinking and worrying, realization comes like a light dispersing the dark clouds.

In all the trials and tribulations I had gone through, was there a single one I had not hurdled?  Isn’t being alive and writing now proof enough that I even survived life-threatening events?  In everything that had happened, did God ever ignore or forsake me?

Asking myself those questions and answering them truthfully made me realize that my Father in Heaven loves me a lot!  He has not for a single moment left me by myself.  In all of those terrifying moments, He made sure that I made it through all of them.  He always paved the way for me to find any help I would need whenever I needed it most from surprisingly or unlikely sources.  Time and time again, the Bible passage from Matthew 7:7 was proven true to me.

So, despite being worried for knowing my beloved is sick, I am much more relieved now for I believe God will watch over my loved ones and will help us through these tests.  I know God is with us. 


 

Heavily Laden (Poetry)

When my heart feels this laden heavily,
          To whom do I call?

Not the popular Ghostbusters surely?

          Should I just act cool?

When many things seem ro be uncertain,

          Can’t I do something?

Then I raised my eyes up in the heaven

          The Holy Being

Placed his hands upon my heart…and PEACE reigned.

           

Foolish Me (Poetry)

  • How good the Father is to a sinner like me
  • He keeps me from doing any iniquity 
  • He keeps me safe, secure, away from any harm
  • If only I will believe and keep myself calm.
  • My greatest problem, though, is with this foolish heart
  • Which with fears, worries, doubts is never seemed apart
  • Despite knowing, deep in my heart, my faith is great
  • Yet I always tend to fall in such a sad state.
  • Oh, my dear Father, please keep your patience with me
  • Please get rid of this petty insecurity
  • From my own weaknesses, please save me, have mercy
  • For without you, I’m nothing, that’s a certainty.

Carrying that Heavy Luggage Called Responsibility

Responsibility, to some might be easy

As counting one to three, or climbing a short tree.

But for me, it is like carrying the whole world

Upon my back like the Indian legend of old.

I took each of them to heart, very seriously

For I believe in my heart, that it’s my duty

To fulfill them, for the sake of my family

As well as my contribution to my country.

These responsibilities, in whatever form,

Should be faced with a committed heart, that’s the norm

But sad to say, not everyone is that stalwart

Who can keep up with it with a strong and brave heart.

To those who have the tendency to fall, waver,

I deeply pray your faith remains strong whenever

Self-doubts and weariness suddenly take over

For God is our Refuge, so please do remember.

Dust on a Dry Summer

As I sit here moping, I ask myself how could this be?
My mind’s a mess but I’m the image of serenity

To passing onlookers, how calm and composed I must be

Deep inside,  I’m so torn up it’s nothing but tragedy.

From North to South, from East to West, they all ganged up on me

Trials, hardships, difficulties, they’re all my enemy

They can be so mean, they can be troublesome, they’re so nasty

I look around, no one’s there, I look up, “God, please help me”.

There’s nowhere else I can turn on to, but Lord, only You

Can give me the answer I need, the one I can cling to 

When everything around me seemed to be in great despair

When all my hope have shattered and no one else seemed to care.

Dear Father, upon your hands, I completely surrender

Everything in me, my whole life, anything I hold dear

To guide me, to enlighten me, for You to take over

For without You, I’m nothing but dust on a dry summer.

Appeals of the Heart (Poetry)

  • When I woke up today, can’t help to ask myself 
  • how to start this day, when confidence in one’s self 
  • is waning, fear in my body begins to creep 
  • that the thought of just stepping off bed makes me weep.
  • And so I closed my eyes, to the Lord God I pray,
  • Father, hold me by my hand, by my side, please stay.
  • Today’s trials, challenges, all other ordeals,
  • Help me survive, overcome them, my heart appeals.
  • And so I face the day with spirit of calmness
  • Despite all difficulties, my mind is at peace.
  • For God will not forsake me, He will be with me,
  • My refuge, I believe with all sincerity.